Wakatipu By Waka
Despite the go-go-go pace of Queenstown, we decide to take it down a notch today. Get up late, eat a light breakfast, and then drive up past swaths of mountain lupine to the top of Lake Wakatipu. We get lunch at a little cafe in Glenorchy, and while there we find a kayak outfitter in Kinloch who can take us out on the lake and up the river above.
Kinloch is, basically, a lodge and some campsites, and is accessible only via a 10km gravel road after driving 20km past Glenorchy. Our kayak guide Bas turns out to be from the Netherlands — yet another transplant in the Queenstown area, lured in by the beautiful and accessible landscape. We head out from the north end of Wakatipu, a sapphire-blue, 80km-long glacier puddle.
We land on a rocky beach some ways south and embark on foot toward an unidentified ruin a ways into the forest. Bas shows us the remains of what appears to be an English settlement, probably over a hundred years old, but with no concrete info or formal research, he doesn’t know for sure. All that’s left are some rock-walled terraces, a couple of collapsed chimneys, and a telegraph wire that appears now and again through the leaf mold.
Back in our kayaks, we paddle back up to the meeting of the Dart River and Lake Wakatipu, and head up through the currents. On the way, our accommodating guide offers to tow the paddle-weary Gloriane, who happily accepts the free ride. We wander around in the wetlands and flats for a bit, then settle in on the shore for a beer before heading back home.
Routeburn Tramps
Our vow to stay on the outside of Queenstown still intact after a night’s rest, it’s back into the trusty Yaris and toward the mountains. Today is a day of ‘tramping’ (Kiwi for ‘hiking’), but we stop first in Glenorchy to check out the local scene. And…there’s nothing much to see, so after a snack we hit the Routeburn Track, one of New Zealand’s “Great Walks”.
The Great Walks are a handful of world-class hikes spread throughout NZ. Routeburn is near Queenstown, in the Fiordland region; our time only grants us a day-long in-and-out, but the whole track is 3-4 days long. The well-built track leads us across swaying cable bridges and into a beech forest, alongside a gorge filled with the bluest water we’ve ever seen.
Frequent stops to cool our feet in glacial melt streams keep us energized. We make it as far as Routeburn Flats hut, where other hikers are resting up for the next leg or staying the night. A bit past there, after a steep uphill, we decide we’ve reached halfway and head back down the mountain to the sheep pastures below.
Back in Queenstown (vow notwithstanding, we still gotta eat!), we stumble across The Cow restaurant in an old cow shed, hidden in a back alley. After a long hike, what we need most is nourishment, and their spaghetti Bolognese is exactly what we’re looking for.
Mario Kart For Grown-ups
Sunrise over the Banks Peninsula. Another breakfast with eggs from right outside our door and a quick goodbye to the alpacas, and we’re back in the Yaris on our way to the Christchurch airport. We’re treated to spectacular aerial views of the Southern Alps on our way south to Queenstown.
Once off the plane and out of the airport, we take care of some logistics and tramp up an hour-long climb to the top of the gondola to get in the Queenstown adventureland spirit. We didn’t hoof it all this way just for the view, though — we did it for the luge!
We saw this on the internets a while back, and knew it had to happen. The Queenstown luge is like real-life Mario Kart, and we bomb it a couple of times, first on the Scenic Track (Mushroom Circuit) and then on the Advanced Track (Rainbow Road). Pretty fun, but it would be better with Golden Mushrooms and Banana Peels.
Back down in the town, we stumble across a moa! We thought these bigger-than-ostrich flightless birds were extinct, but there’s one sitting right in the center of Queenstown. Wandering around looking for dinner, we find that Queenstown is *completely* overrun by adrenaline-junkie tourists, and vow to stay out of town as much as possible for the next three days…
Banks and Back
We’ve given ourselves only one day to wander around Akaroa and the Banks peninsula, and we fill it up. Will this be the most beautiful part of our trip? It’s looking like a serious contender. Morning brings a sunrise over the hills around the harbor. We cook up a delicious breakfast with multi-colored eggs from multi-colored chickens living 50 feet from us, and step outside to hang out with “the boys”, the five Suri alpacas sharing the property with us.
After walking around the property, dodging sheep poo and swinging on what looks like a Great Depression-era rope swing high up in the hills, we eat a quick lunch and drop back down into Akaroa. We pick up a couple of pies (somewhere between a souffle and a pasty) to eat later and visit The Giant’s House.
The Giant’s House is a nearly 20-year work always-in-progress by Josie Martin. The grounds of this house are saturated with mosaic sculptures and random oddities. The amount of detail is incredible! And so much character. Gloriane in particular is enchanted with all the quirky touches carved into the space, and with Josie’s matching personality.
Done with civilization for the day, we drive up and then back down to Le Bons Bay. Tucked in between two ridges and well-protected from the South Pacific beyond, calm Le Bons reflects the deep azure of the sky above. We tiptoe across tidal flats and up the inlet that feeds into the bay, through a pine forest, and finally back to our car for an early night watching The Whale Rider on DVD.
From North to South
These are our last few hours on the North Island until just before we leave New Zealand. We bid farewell to the land of Maori, Zorb, and smelly warmth, and hop on a plane to Christchurch.
A quick tour of Christchurch reveals that it was truly devastated by the earthquakes last year, and is still recovering. We pick up supplies and head southeast to the Banks peninsula, and into a massive rainstorm. Eric puts on his Ryan Gosling face and drives straight in, through windy, foggy roads that are thankfully nearly completely free of traffic.
The clouds and rain don’t let up until after we’ve checked in at Kereru, our B&B perched on a mountaintop overlooking Akaroa harbor, so we head down into Akaroa proper to get some dinner. Oysters and Monteith’s Black tide us over while we take in the tiny town. Babushka Gloriane sings along with “Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” to keep us warm on the chilly patio.
We find that bookings really *are* essential, especially in a town as small as Akaroa, and accept a 9:15 reservation at The Little Bistro. But it’s well worth it — amazing French-tinged Kiwi grub, and dessert served with a tiny shovel — enough for sweet dreams that night back on the mountain.
Chief Eric of Kea Waka
Early morning at Lake Okareka: cool, tranquil, quiet. We find a trail around the lake’s wetlands and eavesdrop on pakeku, tui, and black swans. Off in the distance, we hear a woman calling her cows home (no, really!). Feels like a Kiwi Sound of Music.
Breakfast with avocado and Vegemite on toast (the Marmite factory is still rebuilding after the Christchurch earthquake, so the locals have to make do with an Aussie import for the time being), and we head down to Wai-O-Tapu, “Geothermal Wonderland”.
By “wonder”, I think they mean “I wonder why it smells so naaaasty.” Glad we didn’t have eggs for breakfast, because these bubbling pits with names like “Devil’s Hole” and “Sulphur Cave” stink something awful. But they have pretty colors and steamy currents, so they make for good photo-ops.
Not content to see without touching, we head up the road to Kerosene Creek, a natural hot creek. The pictures don’t do it justice — think a nice, hot bath, in the middle of a stream bed. And not too smelly 🙂
Lunch in Rotorua and then we drive north to find the home of the original Zorb. What’s Zorb? Imagine being tossed inside a giant inflatable hamster ball with a bucket of warm water and tossed down a big hill. With sheep watching you. We ended up choosing OGO, a newer cousin of Zorb, with longer runs and cleaner rides. Turns out the guy who created Zorb sold it to some other folks and let them run it into the ground, while he went bigger and better with OGO. Wish we had video from inside the ball…this was SO MUCH FUN and hilarious. Eric’s abs hurt from laughing the whole way down.
At night, we board the bus to a Maori hangi, Kea Waka (‘waka’, in Maori, is used to describe any vehicle), where Gloriane volunteers Eric to be chief of our tribe. This means Eric gets to stand in front of a hundred other tourists while Maori warriors swing spears at his face. You know, “representing his tribe.”
Arriving at the Maori village Tamaki, we’re schooled on the ancient Maori ways, learn Te Wero (“The Challenge”) and poi dances, and grub on some earth-cooked Maori delicacies. On the way back to town, Chief Eric is called up to the front of the waka to entertain his tribe on the ride back to our home village. This task mainly entails coercing the tribe into singing songs from their home countries, i.e. The Beatles.
As the waka pulls into its home port, Chief Eric manages to come up with a parting joke to further delight his tribe. “What kind of boat does Fozzie the Bear use to travel across the Pacific Ocean? …A “waka waka”! Heeeeeey!” And with that, Chief Eric jumps out the open door before his tribe turns into an angry mob.
